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Thursday
May302013

Texts From A Potter Newbie

So. I have this friend. She's a smart lady, a professional and a serious bookworm. But in all the years I've known her, she has refused to read any of the books I recommend. She's more of an "airport fiction" gal. I'm drawn to the fantastic.

I am a Potter Nerd.

She is not.

This past week we were discussing the various pros and cons of our favorite books. She said she likes journey fiction. She likes a big, strapping hero; she likes stories about very wicked villains and heroes with supreme flaws.

I told her “then Potter would be perfect for you.”

“No,” she said, “it’s for kids.”

Then I regaled her on the many and various reasons that Potter is absolutely not simply a children’s series. (I did not scare her with information on fanfiction or just how devious the Potter fandom truly is).

Begrudgingly, she agreed to read the series. What follows is her texts to me based on her knee-jerk reaction to Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone. (They are not screenshots because I’ve yet to figure that one out on my new Galaxy).

I’ll do my best to keep you updated, because, let’s face it, there’s nothing better than someone discovering a new world. Well, that’s not true. What’s better than that, is watching that discovery first hand.

 

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone – The Boy Who Lived

 “Wait. They’re just gonna leave a baby on the doorstep? What if he gets frostbite?”

“He’s not going to get frostbite. Keep Reading.”

 

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone – The Vanishing Glass

“Okay. Harry’s family are snots. Please tell me he grows up to kick their asses.”

“He grows up to kick ass. That’s all I’m saying.”

 

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone – The Keeper of the Keys

“Oh, I know what’s going to happen…that furry guy is going to kick the uncle’s ass.”

“What furry guy?”

“The one that kicked in the door.”

“You mean Hagrid?”

“Yeah. Him. He’s going to eat them.”

“LOL! No, boo, Hagrid isn’t going to eat anybody. Keep reading!”

 

 *Apparently, I may have been correct in recommending the series because I did not hear from my friend for hours and hours. My evil plan, she is working.*

 

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone – The Midnight Duel

“I think Ron has a problem with strong women. He sure hates Hermione.”

“Maybe he’s just deflecting. Maybe he really thinks she’s shiny.”

“Nah. She likes Harry.  They’re gonna hook up.”

O___o “KEEP READING”

(and my Good Ship heart broke just a wee bit).